Today we went to Gayatri's place.Ohh forgot to mention we means Ankush,Priti,Chenthil and me. Gayatri's grandmother was expired. Gayatri was quite upset.The atmosphere at her place was quite heavy. Just sitting at that place my mind wandered back to time of my father's death. I dont have very clear memory of that place called Doyang, in Nagaland. I did my initial primary classes there at that remote place.
Unlike all other things at that place, the day of my fathers death is so very fresh in my mind. It never goes, how hard i try. All the events on that day of 20 May 1995 comes like a motion picture to mind with utmost clearity. I clearly remember each moment of that day, memory of each moment of that day pains like anything. I dont know why i am writing all this, but even while writing all this, each moment is so heavy with those painful memory,which never fades.
Today also it seems like that all that happened just yesterday only,still sometimes i feel that some day he will walk up to the door and i will run up into his arms and grasp him so hard that he can never ever leave me again. That body of him, those burning flames, those ashes never goes away from mind.
Life was forcefully turned into some unknown direction, never to comeback again. today also i feel that my own personality of today might be very much different in case he was there..entire meaning of life would have changed.. everything would have been different.. so very very different
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